SEEKING WISDOM

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Delights .. then Desires

We live our lives through opportunities and changes. We go from season to season, changes to changes, or the way the bible puts it, from glory to glory. That's God's purpose for our lives. He came to give us life and life to the full.

My walk with Jesus has also experienced changes. From being a baby in Christ, when I only know the expression “I want… I need…give me…help me…”, slowly God carry me and lead me to grow into maturity. I believe maturity does not end until you reach the end of your journey in this world. In the process of maturity, my faith and wisdom grows as His will for my life unfolds bit by bit.

At times, I found myself on that intersection where I don’t know which way to go. I know what I want and my desires and dreams, but I wasn’t sure how to get it. I have a vision on what's in the future. A very vague vision though. That’s when God wants me to trust Him even more. Just like driving to an unknown place, that’s when I have to let him show me the way and I only need to drive the car. As I look back to the journey I’ve made, I remembered how scary and uncertain those drives were.

Now, I found myself in that intersection again. This time is even worse... I don't even have a vision of the future. I don't have the tiniest clue on where God wants me to be. I see my life at its so called "stable condition" or stagnant. It's at that point in life where everything seems OK and all needs seems fulfilled. But I know that I want a further increase in life, but just don't know HOW to increase it. My faith has grown though... well.. I FEEL my faith has grown. I can trust God more and I'm not easily worried about things anymore. My faith is "free-er" somehow.

But...I want more...... I'm content, but not satisfied... I hangs onto His words in Psalm 37 (Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart). But can't help to think, where's the fulfilment of that desires Lord? My non-christian friends can do better than I do financially! I've served God through different kinds of ministry. I want to be able to offer more, but right now, I have little seed to plant. How can I harvest out of nothingness? I want my finance to increase, I want my career to flourish, I want to see the next glory that is ahead. I want God to use me more. I long for His Name be glorified through me and whatever I do!!!

But what can I do?

Psalms 37:1-6

When we look abroad we see the world full of evil-doers, that flourish and live in ease. So it was seen of old, therefore let us not marvel at the matter. We are tempted to fret at this, to think them the only happy people, and so we are prone to do like them: but this we are warned against. Outward prosperity is fading. When we look forward, with an eye of faith, we shall see no reason to envy the wicked. Their weeping and wailing will be everlasting.

The life of religion is a believing trust in the Lord, and diligent care to serve him according to his will. It is not trusting God, but tempting him, if we do not make conscience of our duty to him. A man's life consists not in abundance, but, Thou shalt have food convenient for thee. This is more than we deserve, and it is enough for one that is going to heaven. To delight in God is as much a privilege as a duty. He has not promised to gratify the appetites of the body, and the humours of the fancy, but the desires of the renewed, sanctified soul. What is the desire of the heart of a good man? It is this, to know, and love, and serve God. Commit thy way unto the Lord; roll thy way upon the Lord, so the margin reads it. Cast thy burden upon the Lord, the burden of thy care. We must roll it off ourselves, not afflict and perplex ourselves with thoughts about future events, but refer them to God. By prayer spread thy case and all thy cares before the Lord, and trust in him.

We must do our duty, and then leave the event with God. The promise is very sweet: He shall bring that to pass, whatever it is, which thou has committed to him. (Ps 37:7-20)


I should do that... and should've realised that all this time, I delight in His WORKS... not in Him. Wanting to succeed and to have His promise that God's children are more than conquerors, we are head and not the tail being fulfiled in my life, is what God wants me to have. But I should not worry and be anxious about how to grow and what God will do through me cos it's not about me and what I can do. But it's about Him and who, what, when he wants to use to glorify His Name. God WILL make it grow. Just delighting in him, is a desire fulfiled.